Yorkshire Meet and BUCS!

I headed off to university on a meet Friday to watch it leave without me for the first time in about 2 years :( but BUCS or not we were getting up there one way or another. As skipper elect Peate called the shots on the bus, Jack K and I went down the pub before getting some sleep for the horrendously early wakeup 6am wakeup call that awaited us. The plan was to roll up to Sheffield, crush the competition then roll up to Yorkshire before drinking hard and climbing hard the next day. Only a few of these points on the list were actually achieved but we gave it a good shot! All we saw of the journey up was Charlie and Ellie sneaking a tin of cat food into Peate’s shopping- well played!

Saturday for the meet crew dawned rather damp, in complete opposition to the forecast. As far as I know an initial inspection of conditions suggested wet rock so a walk round Goredale Scar and Malham was decided upon on which everyone had a good time from the look of the photos! I am unable to add any more to this but Peate will take over….

The skipper

I began this trip feeling slightly anxious about taking on the role of captain until the BUCS guys drove back from Sheffield Saturday evening. My worry at what could go wrong had me triple checking I had packed the hut keys, learning the route there and even being punctual…..for once. Once filled up with petrol and all aboard we got on the M1 in good time, everyone longing for a refreshing tipple and some relaxation after a week studying. However the drive there turned out to be the beginning of a weekend of mockery which began as I announced, in my most authoritative tone, that people had just 10 minutes at the services, and continued wholeheartedly when I accidentally smashed James' large bottle of Ginger Wine. We arrived at the Lowstern hut very late in the evening and were all impressed at the quality and luxury (swankiness) of the place. Despite a feeling that we should perhaps all get merry, after some fervent guidebook reading we obeyed our tired eyes and retired to bed.

Partly out of psyche to get climbing at Crookrise crag and to maintain Jim's early starts I sprung out of bed at 7 and after our early night we were in the minibus on the way to the crag by 8. During the drive we developed a growing feeling of disappointment as we were yet again greeted by poor weather, myself in particular as I wanted to make up for the previous trip. As we pulled into the car park we could see Crookrise looming ominously out of the rain clouds, and instead we decided it would be better to take advantage of the early start and do the walk that me and James had planned the previous night that went past Malham cove, past the Tarn, and back through Goredale Scar. I took lead with the map reading in an attempt to prove myself and we quickly arrived at Malham cove, only to stand and admire the size and overhanging nature of the cove. (Its fucking nails under there- Jim) We rambled down the muddy Pennine way in good spirits and in-between brief showers and strong winds, we joked about Charlie's ability to fall over.



 After a brief lunch at Malham Tarn Ellie, with some apprehension, took over the map reading and carried us over the hills to Goredale Scar. We made a steep descent into the gorge and stood looking at the impressive waterfalls and the pondered over the seeming disappearance of the obvious path, which turned out to take the form of an exciting down climb next to the spray of the waterfall. Thoughts of an immense clusterfuck flashed through my mind, but after getting Chris to helpfully check it out and doing part of it myself, with the help of Sam and Josh we all got down in one piece. The wet down climb, whilst really safe, gave the walk a sense of adventure. With high spirits which were accompanied by somewhat frustratingly good weather we joined an easy path back to Malham in search of a Pub. We decided on a drive to Settle where we, Bethan in particular, had a little explore through gear shops and second hand book shops to end up in the Talbot Arms.​

 

The BUCS crew got going pretty early and after a fuel stop we were hightailing it to Sheffield. We parked up at the Works and entered the wall to see a sea of down jackets- several thousand geese/ducks had been harvested to keep the throng of climbers warm! We got registered and warmed up and started wandering round to have a look at the problems. As is always the way, almost everything looked very achievable, so the main thing was to guard against overconfidence and watch someone else do it first before blowing the flash! We split into teams- the girls in one, me Brad and Dan in one and Jack, Lally and Callum the last. Everyone definitely felt the competition nerves to start with;  I climbed the first few problems in shocking style before Brad and Dan made them look easy and I only started to calm down once I had 40 points banked. I steadily started to feel better though and our group got on a really good roll as we entered the high teens. After falling off the final jug of the number 17 roof problem I screamed 'fuck' loudly (which Harry tells me the whole wall heard), and climbed some slab to calm down :p I got it second go- by this point everyone had split up to tick the stuff they had independently struggled on. Brad however had damaged a tendon in his finger so cleaned up the easier stuff before chilling out. Jack and I teamed up to dispatch 19 on the Berghaus comp wall; this wasn’t helped by some communication issues, where I asked Jack if a certain hold was in and thought he said no. Unfortunately it was actually in and only other people shouting the correct info got me to the top! Jack also flashed it and sent the sandbag slabby 18 with seconds to go on the clock. Everyone did really well, with the award for dumb shit of the day going to Dan for failing to tick the 5 easiest problems after losing track of time and leaving 50 points out there- check the FB page for results! :)

Dog of the day

Heroic pose- shame the comp had finished!

We packed up quickly and headed down the pub for a celebratory beer, where Lally made friends with a lovely German shepherd and Brad bought a 7% beer for £5.40 a pint! After some minor parking issues we sorted the cars out and Jack and Amy started off to Yorkshire while Yas headed back to Leicester- thanks Yas! After a Tesco stop where I inadvertently purchased some ‘Menhancer’ pills thanks to Amy and Emily (I don’t need ‘menhancing’) we kept on going, progress only being interrupted by my nervous checking of the rugby score. We arrived at the hut and after a spiritual experience in the amazing shower I ate my curry out of a dogbowl and started drinking. The infamy of previous Yorkshire meets failed to materialise but age was no barrier for Frosty who consumed a lot of wine and fed the fire every time someone complained it was too hot, which was often. People disappeared off to bed and we hoped for dry conditions in the morning.

I woke up on Sunday to find dry conditions, if some very ominous looking clouds away in the distance. I commented to Frosty that it looked like the end of the world, to which he replied that he felt like the end of the world. Given that he was meant to be getting on an E3 later this could only end well. We packed up the hut really quickly and got going, with hilarity arising from Jack leaving me behind at the rubbish stop. We set off up to the crag without Frosty, who had gone to get a ‘stimulant’ in his words, and started off at Low Man. Everyone was pretty psyched and got going; Ellie on Square Chimney and Whisky Crack MVS, Callum on Fluted Columns and Ollie over on Stew Pot. I am completely unable to remember what everyone did so let me know.  Peate led Pinnacle Flake Climb Severe which Bethan and Josh seconded, while I got on the Matterhorn Boulder f5+, which Chris and Amy also ticked, before watching Ellie gurn her way through the horrible crux of the Chimney and beached whale her way onto the halfheight ledge. At this point I left to see what Emily was on, which was an utterly hideous looking crack which she thought was VS but was actually an HVDiff. Read the guidebook people! :p I returned in time to catch a visibly scared Ellie topping out the crack above the worst placed cam I’ve ever seen- cracking lead, its given VS on UKC votes and Jack and I nearly fell off it last year :) 

Having stood underneath the classic HVS Great Western I was psyched, and roped Frosty in for a belay in very windy conditions. By placing as little gear as possible and prioritising cams over nuts I avoided the worst of the pump and topped out the finishing jamming crack having put only one jam in! Frost argued this meant I hadn’t got the tick but I strongly disagree- awesome route with mega exposure. Over the way, I think Josh had led an HS called ZigZag and a group of people were soloing the ‘route’ Safe As- at Severe that was a gift, take the tick! I went back over to Frost and bullied him onto Western Front E3 5c, as per our agreement. Frosts trad head momentarily deserted him and I thought he was going to bail, but fair play to him he got on it after a few downclimbs. Having placed the crucial wire he panicked in several cams and a good high nut, before resting for ages on the big jug and pumping out at the ‘karate chop’ crux jam. He lowered off and Jack decided he wanted no part of the route, thereby conceding the bet I had with him in the pub!

Meanwhile, Charlie was seconding Ellie before they turned their attention to Fluted Columns, which Charlie led. A rope clusterfuck resulted in the ropes ending up at the top with no climbers on them and the gear still in the route, necessitating Ellie to lead through. I believe she found 3 lying down spots on one route for some reason…anyway, this was knocked down without incident. Over the way, James had attempted classic HVS Overhanging Groove and given it a pretty shit effort by all accounts. However with some bullying from myself and Emily he got back on it and gave it a right good go, with all his gear in the lower crack falling out and leaving a gnarly groundfall potential. James pumped out arranging a gear nest, so Lally led through the gear and topped it out despite taking a manly whipper and scaring some pigeons to nearly fly into his face. I had failed on my main objective for the day, Wall of Horrors E3, after completely failing to read the second crux and taking several whippers onto a very badly placed cam that I later saw was only actually engaged on 3 lobes…safety factor high.

The mince factor was beginning to rise, and I only caught snippets of what happened with more far flung groups. Jack and Amy had been bouldering all day, and Steve ruined his ankle falling off a VS. Emily also took a sizeable whipper on her VS, and Peate pumped out on Square Chimney and ruined his own fingers. Ellie and Sam continued to climb as the drizzle fell, and attracted a crowd of spectators as Frosty abseiled into the gloom to retrieve my gear in the distance. The route, a VS called Z Climb, was described as ‘extremely traditional’ by Almscliff guru Frosty, necessitating loads of jams. Put it this way, I ain’t leading it. Ellie gave it a serious effort before she took another excellent fall- good gear skills everyone! Bethan also got a first lead in on Low Man before the dark began to close in.

Urghh...

 

Hero mode!

At this point only a few groups were still climbing. I headed off to give the final HVS classic Demon Wall a bash, but got ludicrously pumped on the top section and couldn’t make the final massive reach for the jug. Each go I had I felt worse and took several massive falls, one the length of the crag. I eventually bailed and handed over to Lally, who was also too pumped and fell. Chris made us feel weak by flashing a V6, while Frost casually completed his warmup circuit of a V6 and a few V7’s. At this point we were tired and packed up to go home- a great long day on a great grit crag. Everyone was knackered by all accounts- unsurprised! Almscliff is an unforgiving beast of a crag- if you can climb VS here you can climb it anywhere. Lots of whippers, and lots of good gear- if you aren’t flying, you aren’t trying! Keep the psych levels high for Wales!

Fallcliffe Meet: 7th-9th February 2014

Amid the worst weather forecast I’d seen for a meet in some time ULMC returned for Semester 2, and returned with a bang. The Peak District was the destination, and with the forecast suggesting two days of nonstop rain I didn’t hold out much hope at all of getting some climbing done; Sunday was looking like our best bet for anything. Nevertheless off we drove, the bus making terrible noises all the way there and driving like a 1 litre hatch rather than the 2 litre beast it is. Brad negotiated us safely there and we swiftly got drinking as it was Jack’s birthday.

 The return of Harry Holkham after a terms absence and Amy Mason (after a years) got things started, and before long Jack had eaten his birthday cake and had a dirty pint placed in front of him by Harry which contained a large amount of chilli powder. Jack made the worst effort I have ever seen to consume this pint, initially downright refusing before being bullied/peer pressured into finally doing it in three separate gulps. He was obviously annoyed at my relentless abuse, because 10 minutes later I had a similar pint placed in front of me, this time with coffee granules. Mindful of the abuse I’d dished out, I had no choice but to get on with it and just about got away with it. The rest of the night passed in a blur. Almost every member of my family was insulted by Jack, who rapidly regressed as the night wore on, culminating in him hitting his own head on the wooden pole holding the hut up (video to follow). Brad too was on the sauce, stealing Izaak’s keg to good effect. Eventually we all hit the hay and waited for the inevitable day of mincing.

Except this wasn’t the case. I staggered out of sleeping bag to find Jack still drunk, Brad nearly dead and bright sunshine outside. Nevertheless after a bit of persuasion everyone got going pretty quickly and we were on our way to Burbage North to make the most of whatever dryness we were allowed. The crag was miraculously dry and after initial confusion people got going in some of the windiest conditions I’ve ever seen. I started up the HS Lieback, inadvertently straying onto the VS jamming crack next door, and was greeted by incredible winds at the top. I set up a belay laughing at the absurdity of the whole situation and brought Sam and Steve up. Meawhile, Ellie, Emily and Charlie had formed a dream team and were off with Emily leading Black Slab Arete Severe 4A. By all accounts this went off without a hitch barring Emily forgetting her top setup and delaying Ellie and Charlie hard. James and Harry vividly described a hex placed by Emily that appeared to be merely sitting on the crack rather than being wedged inside it. Amy was gurning her way up the greenest Diff on the crag for some reason, Sentinel Chimney, which was giving Katie and Bethan moaning ammunition rather than psych. Nevertheless they both did it! 

Jack, no longer drunk but with a crippling hangover, had started up Ringo S 4a but bailed, leaving Sam to take up the baton which he successfully did- cracking effort in the cold, those are hard for Severe! Brad too had suffered initial failure, sliding out of his crack next door, Ring Climb S 4a. Despite his claims this ‘fall’ did not constitute a true whipper, but he did get back on and finish it, bringing up a grumpy and freezing Mason after him. I wasn’t psyched for anything else in the area so Steve set off up the Diff Ring Chimney and Peate and I assisted his top setup. (I have forgotten what some people did- comment and let me know J)At this point people were noticeably grumpy and cold, so Jack took people off to boulder at the end of the crag, while James, Brad, Mason, Harry and I moved along to Long Tall Sally area, leaving Ellie leading Lieback- good effort. After an aborted attempt on Long Tall by James I started up Amazon Crack, which felt bloody hard for HS but I am shit at cracks. Everyone drifted away to the bouldering area, and after watching Charlie lead Ring Climb onsight and thereby making herself better than Brad, we headed over there too. The weather was closing in so after a spot of soloing in the biting wind the deicision was made to quit while we were ahead. It seems everyone had a good time boudering, with Izaak taking a fall from the top of the Chant before getting back on and doing it- nice one! We headed off to Outside for a coffee. Both Jack’s cashed in, with the recovering meet sec ruthlessly exploiting his Dad’s generosity in buying a new pair of walking boots and Peate replacing his ancient Evolvs. Saturday evening was much more tame- we were all in bed by midnight. Getting soft, clearly…

True to type, Sunday dawned hosing it down. After tidying the hut we headed off to climb Kinder Scout in the rain. This is the solitary namesake of the ‘Peak’ district, but this is pushing the definition pretty significantly- its flat on top and looks nothing like a peak. After negotiating most of the approach hill in 1^st gear out of necessity and killing the clutch, we arrived and set off. The initial boring plod section turned into a pretty involved gorge-esque scramble, before we topped out onto the plateau and had the obligatory photo:

  

Highlights of the days walk included Ellie and Emily ridiculing my attempts to get them to appreciate the nice view, the carrot making another hilarious appearance in a ULMC photo (for some reason not on facebook, yet), Mason admitting that she was enjoying the walk despite moaning excessively, and me and Harry getting a little lost. After trying what felt like the hardest mantel in the world with a rucksack on my back we descended the Pennine Way and hit the pub for a bit. We clearly did something useful as everyone was knackered- I’ve never heard the bus so quiet! Despite not getting all that much climbing done I’ve got to see the weekend as a success because I didn’t expect to do any! In any case Friday night more than made up for it- you’re a disgrace Jack. 

Hopefully we will have better luck in Yorkshire, but rest assured the drinking will continue when the BUCS crew arrive Saturday evening! See you then!